Mocking Me
by LayDCardinal
Summary: The toothbrush was mocking me. Holden/Sean


Disclaimer: Nothing in this is mine, nor shall it ever be.

It sits there in its cup mocking me; the last reminder of our relationship that I haven't purged from my house.

Not entirely true I suppose. Holden did most the purging himself. Taking his clothing, nick-knacks, and even his favorite coffee mug.

The purple colored toothbrush sits there mocking me though. Even its color brings up memories I'd rather forget. A drug store at midnight when Holden realized that the only thing he'd forgotten at his house was his favorite toothbrush. Who would have thought that the only thing that store carried was the pink and purple variety. Holden had decided on the lesser of two evils. I voted for the pink if for no other reason then to tease him every morning we woke up together.

It sits in its cup on the sink, mocking me silently. I swear the damn thing is yelling at me. _Yep, knew you couldn't man up! Bout time he figured out what chump he was living with. Well he'll find a nice man out there. Someone with fewer complications!_

Damn toothbrush!

It reminded me that I built my bathroom with two vanities, thinking towards the future. The house has four large bedrooms. They are waiting silently as guest rooms for the kids I had always hoped would one day occupy them. The kitchen and dining room are large. They are the center of the home, as they were when I grew up, the place where the family gathered.

Of course I got rid of everything in the main rooms that reminded me of Holden. It turned out to be a vast array of things. At some point I know I'll have to hire a decorator now that I've donated half the house to goodwill. The only things left are the two chairs in front of the fireplace. They cost a shitload so I refuse to donate them. Them and the damned toothbrush of course.

As I looked out the window towards the beach I can hardly not think about it as the place we met.

It started as a pick up game of volleyball between two large friendly families who were getting together to barbeque on the beach and celebrate summer's arrival.

I remember it like it was yesterday. We'd played one game already when Holden appeared making excuses to his parents that his client had insisted on a last minute meeting. Their patient smiles declared more than words that it wasn't the first time, and they knew it wouldn't be the last.

I watched Holden take off his shirt and join the game on my team when Holden's sister left to help with the children. Holden had one hell of a body. All lean and ropey with muscle.

I noted that Holden didn't have as much muscle as I did, but then not many did. Holden had more of a swimmers body.

Desire flared and I'd never been happier my swim trunks were loose in the front.

Holden had come over and introduced himself to the players he didn't know easily, lastly coming up to me.

I held out his hand, happy that he wouldn't be able to see the lust he was sure was in my eyes with my dark shades on. I was sure he imagined Holden holding onto my hand longer than necessary.

Over the next hour I enjoyed the view from behind Holden, trying to ensure I didn't miss plays as I admired the way swim trunks clunks to the man's fine ass.

To this day I'm not exactly sure how they ended up in my kitchen. Thinking back hard, I thought it might have been more beer. I had offered to get more and Holden offered to help. Somehow though, I was quickly pushed against my kitchen cabinets and Holden's mouth was hot on my. God the man could kiss. Actually there wasn't much that man didn't do expertly, or in a way that failed to turn me on.

Fifteen minutes later beer was finally delivered, and over the next months Holden had implanted himself so firmly in my life that I couldn't remember what the house had been like before Holden.

His architecture books and blueprints seemed to fit right into the office. The man's keys and blackberry found home almost every night in a bowl I'd never noticed was even in the house before.

A loud screeching gull, finally brings me out of my thoughts. That part of my life is done I remind myself firmly. Holden is gone for good.

I grab the toothbrush from the cup, and throw it in the trashcan. Damn thing can't scream at me now.


End file.
